Crypto news

Well darn,

As most of you probably heard, crypto hit the fan. And not in a slight donk on the head kinda way, but a fully loaded diaper caked in butt fudge kinda way. Yep, that’s right. Our portfolios and hearts dropped these past few days as the market plummeted.

So is this it? Have we lost crypto forever? Will my children starve because Elon has a Twitter?

Short answer. No.

The market goes through cycles. Right now we are experiencing a crash. Not just any crash, but the biggest crypto crash in the known universe. However, this is just a natural part of crypto and should not be feared. Markets recover! People survive! Wallets return to normal! So sit tight, relax and enjoy. The crypto coaster is just doing it’s thing. However, if you or a loved one sold at a loss, I have only one thing to say to you.


You screwed the pooch. Everything you built is now sitting in a pile of burning trash. Hopes are shattered and dreams tattered. I feel bad for you. I honestly do. Selling your crypto? More like spitting on a church. Might as well have just burnt your money for warmth in Arizona. Face it. You didn’t lose money because of the market crashing like a drunk Boeing pilot. You lost money because you sold at a loss. However, it’s not too late to learn from your mistakes.

Now is the time to buy! Empty your bank accounts and foreclose your homes! The markets are on the rise!

As we enter a possible bear market, prices of most crypto will slowly start to rise with many dips. Time to put on diamond hands and collect coins like grandpa collects stamps. Fight your emotions, come out victorious! It’s not to late to learn. It’s a better time then ever.

And for all you apes that held strong or bought the dips.

Congrats. Your a reasonable, level-headed and lovable person. A real go getter. A glorious example of a human in their prime. You should feel good about yourself. Happy to be who you are.

Thanks for listening. I hope y’all do amazing things.

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